Damn Damn and Double Damn

I’ve not lost any weight again this week, I’m stuck at 198lbs, which according to the previous weightloss means that I’ve actually gained a pound which is even more depressing.

I know the cookies didn’t help, but I didn’t binge on them, still I guess that they were too much…

I don’t know, I’m very very down about this and feel like I’m fighting a loosing battle. I obviously need to cut more out somewhere but besides the obvious cookies I can’t see where, but I will have to find it, maybe my portions are still too big.

I’m going to try and work in more exercise this week and hopefully that will help things along but I know that’s going to be hard in this metal state. When I’m down on my body all I want to do is go and hide somewhere and I become even more inactive than usual.

I’m so tired of fighting my body and my mind and whatever stupid problems I have with food that I don’t seem to be able to conquer. I don’t want to be fat anymore, I don’t want to be uncomfortable in my body anymore and I hate the fact that my physical form has such an effect on my mental state.

I’ll stop now before I drag myself further into a depressed hole….

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